what we REALLY need to know

unfortunately, as Stephen Downes argues, schools (or even workplaces) do not directly teach us the most important things we need to learn in life. in his article “Things You Really Need to Learn,” he enumerated 10 things we all need to learn in order to be successful. here, i’m listing all ten and giving my take on each.


1. How to predict consequences
i have often referred to this as foresight. more than thinking ahead, or observing patterns and generalities, or focusing on what you want to happen rather than what might happen instead, i’d say that this could also refer to focusing on overall consequences of even small actions, rather than aiming for short-term and short-lived benefits.


2. How to read
i absolutely agree on Downes that everyone should master the skill of critical thinking. “reading” should not be limited to simply being able to make sense of letters and words, but also being able to understand deeply what is being asserted and “being able to cut through the crap and get straight to what is actually being said, without being distracted.”


3. How to distinguish truth from fiction
it sounds all too simple. Yet, i have several times encountered people, profound as they may think they are, who can’t tell when they are being fed with total BS. everything is not exactly what it seems. words, actions, and even facial expressions are so limited as to be able to express a whole plethora of emotions that any human being can feel. everything that happens in this world could be directly or indirectly associated to a lifetime of history and a universe of other occurrences. there is no limit to understanding yourself or others.


4. How to empathize
even if you’re learning this skill only now, be glad. it took me a while to understand how important empathy is and now its one of the few skills i truly am proud of, thanks to my great experiences outside of my comfort zone and to the gift of empathy that my husband rubbed on me). i can’t explain this any better than Downes did so here’s what he said:

It is important to at least recognize that there are other people, and that they live in their own world as well. This will save you from the error of assuming that everyone else is like you. And even more importantly, this will allow other people to become a surprising source of new knowledge and insight.

When you are empathetic you will begin to seek out and understand ways that help bridge the gap between you and other people. Being polite and considerate, for example, will become more important to you. You will be able to feel someone's hurt if you are rude to them. In the same way, it will become more important to be honest, because you will begin to see how transparent your lies are, and how offensive it feels to be thought of as someone who is that easily fooled. Empathy is a genuine feeling in yourself that operates in synch with the other person, a way of accessing their inner mental states through the sympathetic operation of your own mental states.

You need to learn how to have this feeling, but once you have it, you will understand how empty your life was before you had it.

5. How to be creative
i believe i am creative not because i can spring ideas out of nothing, but because, as Downes explains, i can respond to things/occurrences/problems by using or manipulating my knowledge in certain ways. difficult as it is, i do attempt to extract some creative juices when i do my work, recite in class, blog, or even when i communicate with my husband!


6. How to communicate clearly
i understand Downes here as saying that it is not enough to say what we mean and mean what we say. it is “a matter of knowing what you want to say, and then employing some simple tools in order to say it.” i believe that this is one very important challenge to everyone because everyday, every minute, we are faced with the need to look at ourselves and be able to show someone else what is actually inside.


7. How to learn
Downes explains that “when you learn, you are trying to create patterns of connectivity in your brain. you are trying to connect neurons together, and to strengthen that connection. this is accomplished by repeating sets of behaviours or experiences.” in a nutshell, he is encouraging readers to constantly make attempts to learn, learn, learn! i guess that’s why i enjoy blogging --- i always learn something about myself and about every topic i blog about. in my work, however, i tend to painstakingly try to make sure i understand every little aspect of what i’m doing. (hint: google is my favorite thing in the world!)


8. How to stay healthy
this, i guess, is obvious: we must all learn to minimize exposure to diseases and toxins, and maintain our physical body. Downes also reminds us that “you never have to justify protecting your own life and health. If you do not want to do something because you think it is unsafe, then it is your absolute right to refuse to do it.” check.


9. How to Value Yourself
notice how crappy people tend to be constantly validating their own insecurities? i believe that people who have a real sense of self-worth (and self-awareness, if i may add) are free from the burden of unsuccessfully trying to prove themselves to othersall the time, thereby making their own and others’ lives miserable.

IMO, Downes explains it in a very simplistic way, but i agree on the need to believe. believe that you are good enough to have an opinion, have a voice, and have a say, that your contributions do matter. the caveat, i guess, is that you must be careful not to put someone else down just so you could raise yourself up.

10. How to live meaningfully
have you read the quote at bottom of this blog site? it’s a quote from the same ancient philosopher who said that “the unexamined life is not worth living.” (or was it Socrates? oh well.) Downes says it’s the hardest thing to learn and i have to agree. while i pride myself for attempting to live a virtuous life, life is not all that easy or simple, is it?

here are Downes’ recommendations: be dedicated to some purpose or goal, have sense of appreciation to the here and now, realize that your meaningfulness in this world is something you must create for yourself, decide what is worth doing and guide yourself to do it, and most importantly, realize that you have the power to control what you are doing and that consequences (even the bad ones) are, for the most part, a matter choice.



whew! i think i just wrote the most consuming self-help piece i’ll ever write! there’s nothing much left to say, i guess, except that we should all go and reflect, learn and live. now.


photos from deviantART.com.