Mar 31, 2006

it's still because of you

She had the song of Kelly Clarkson in her head -- while eating breakfast, in the shower, on her way to work. It was a last song syndrome, triggered by a tv show from the previous night. She liked the song since she first heard it on the radio. She particularly likes the way kelly clarkson did it.

The tune was humming in her head again as she starts the day's work. And it crept back as she walked out of her office building. She sang the chorus silently to herself, "because of you i never stray too far from the sidewalk."

Suddenly, the song had words for her. The words had meaning and it was piercing in her heart… It wasn’t just a tune humming in her head anymore. It’s now a thud in her chest. It's not just a song about a girl -- some stranger whose disappointments echo erupting fears and pains. It was now her song.



Not all wounds heal. But life does move on and there is hope. She prayed hard. Harder than she’s prayed in years. She likes to pray sometimes. It gives her hope. It’s a pat on the back, saying that things will get better. And she talks back, “what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger.”

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click
here to listen to kelly clarkson's because of you at artistdirect.com

Mar 28, 2006

a challenge to go back to school

lately i've been daydreaming about going back to school. i imagine all the interesting reading materials, all the enlightening lectures that could only now satisfy my deep hunger to learn learn learn.

i look back at my academic endeavors in college with quite a bit of shame... while i'm glad i learned a good deal of epistemology from dr. perez, i still have to thank january for making the class interesting and therefore bearable. although i was inspired by the lectures of dr. de castro on ethics and dr. fernando on the philosophy of law, how i wish i paid more attention to prof. vera cruz and atty. valdez. i appreciated having painfully understood david hume's theory of knowledge and i took delight in discovering socrates through plato's apologia. but i can only wish i tried harder to understand wittgenstein, sartre, karl popper, russel, etc. i enjoyed absorbing the possibilities of philosophy for children and i took pride in having more or less mastered philosophy of religion and ethics. but i regret not having the guts to take dr. lee's and prof. de villa's classes.

not that i didn't appreciate a good education back then. i tried to get a diploma in industrial relations. but hearing all the jargon and incomprehensible discussion from my classmates (who all happened to be HR practitioners!) made me feel so out of my league. trying for a master's degree in philosophy was likewise a futile attempt.

now it's diferent. yeah, i can get educated anywhere -- i'm the perennial student, i learn something new everyday by just clicking my internet explorer. but its not enough. i want more.

i wanna propose policy changes in my workplace and improve our human resource management system. i can see the need for major changes but i'm not sure where to start. i want to be competitive and be able to market my skills in developing and improving companies and organizations. i want to have the chance to work with the best HR practitioners. i want to do more. (naks, parang commercial ng centrum complete!)

that diploma in industrial relations would've been the key. i couldn't handle it 5 years ago, not with my fresh-out-of-college ignorance. now i know i can. armed with over 4 years of experience in human resource development, i'm pretty sure i have the discipline, the background, the motivation, the will to complete a master's degree at the School of Labor and Industrial Relations (SOLAIR). it's gonna be financially challenging. but if i can make room for even six or nine units, it would be well worth the effort and the money.

first things first. i need to talk to the college secretary or any solair official if i need to retake the entrance exam or if i'll just need to submit some requirements to be readmitted.

as beatrix kiddo (uma thurman) said at the back of buck's pussy wagon in kill bill: wiggle your big toe, ynseng.

Mar 23, 2006

singular thoughts

i've been meaning to post about my tone-toneladang ideas. but right now they're still ideas in my head. for now, these will have to do...

i'm wearing the yellow uniform today. that means it's a thursday. funny how the colors of my uniform tell me what day it is, rather than me determining what color to wear based on what day it is. i just know that the first workday of the week -- the morning after the lazy sunday -- i have to wear orange. the next day it's green, which means it must be tuesday. then blue. then yellow. then wash day. it's the one day of the work week that i can stare at my closet and decide what to wear. much as i hate these reflectorized colors, i'm a bit glad that i don't have to freak over what to wear everyday.

congratulations to me and hubby! we just experienced our first appliance purchase! a kolin .75hp aircon. summer na kasi. sobrang init! although i initially felt like i was rushed into deciding whether to buy the aircon, i truly am proud of our purchase. hubby checked the prices of 2nd hand aircons advertised at the buy&sell newspaper. he also asked a few who have some sort of expertise -- my older brother who diligently did his own research prior to the purchase of his aircon and kuya joey (his bro-in-law's brother). he also checked prices in a couple of appliance centers. when we got to western p.tuazon, we were surprised to see steep prices. but the 6 months 0% interest was worth it. malamig na ulit ang mga gabi ng tag-araw. yey!

i'm in an internet cafe near our subdivision in marikina. the P25/hr is fine. they're using mozilla firefox. that's fine too. but may layout looks funny. the marquees in my subtitles look funny. does that have anything to do with the firefox? ...and these keyboard is killing me! printed letters are taped in the keypad (probably coz the letters are faded) and i sometimes need to press hard or press twice ...and the pointer (arrow) keeps moving to the left! (grrr!) i'm really not complaining. as long as the connection is fast and i can access my flash disk, i should be fine. i just have to double double check for typo errors...

paris bennett gave me goosebumps last night. i love the song "fever" and her version was a great diversion to madonna's or kylie minogue's or victoria's. and doesn't chris sound like the vocalist of live? i would love to hear him sing live's dolphin's cry!

love will lead us, alright / love will lead us, she will lead us / can you hear the dolphin's cry? / see the road rise up to meet us / it's in the air we breathe tonight / love will lead us, she will lead us / life is like a shooting star / it don't matter who you are / if you only run for cover, it's just a waste of time / we are lost 'til we are found / this phoenix rises up from the ground / and all these wars are over

i'm pretty sure none of my favorites will be among the bottom 3! can't wait to see the eliminations tonight!!!

Mar 12, 2006

Clint Eastwood by Gorillaz


i bought the Gorillaz album as soon as i heard Clint Eastwood. i memorized the lyrics and i even remember bits of it when i hear the song. i’ve always wondered why this title. but i never wondered what the lyrics meant. i didn’t bother.

gorillaz.unofficial.com explains:
The lyrics address in part the eclectic mix Gorillaz offers, how they can move you and shake up the world despite not being real 'all in your head' (an added dimension to this is that Del [Tha Funkee Homosapien] is rapping in the persona of a ghost in Russel's head, so he is 'not quite real' even with respect to the cartoon Gorillaz world. It's also swaggeringly self-aggrandising. And with beats like this, and a plaintive harmonica that sounds just right, who could argue. The title was chosen because the track sounded a bit like parts of the scores to Clint Eastwood's 'Dollars' films, according to Tom Girling and Jason Cox (titles were added and discarded in a free flowing manner during the process of making the album as songs evolved into each other, and collections of ideas were brought together), however Damon [Albarn] has also stated in an interview that it was also a nod to an old reggae star who went by the name of Clint Eastwood (reggae star Lee 'Scratch' Perry and The Upsetters also recorded an album of this name).

hmm… this should be fun…









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photos from the official gorillaz fansite, fans.gorillaz.com
know the band. check the site and be entertained by their biography...

Mar 11, 2006

my 1st photo layout

this is the result of my first attempt at layouting photos. slow and steady that i am, i had to try it using not my own but someone else's photos. (that way i'd be an expert by the time i do my own!)

photos were abundant. cecille took lots of pictures of her nephew, josh, to send to the kid's mom abroad. cecille only asked me to help her email the digital photos to her sister. i told her i could try to make a collage.

at the time, my computer has just been reformatted so i didn't have the techy softwares, not even a microsoft picture manager. so i patiently used MS Paint. i'm glad it didn't turn out so terrible.

click the photos to see full view.


josh with mom
josh with cecille
photos posted with permission

Mar 10, 2006

HRDS Update (January 2006)

this is the front page of the hrds update i made for january 2006 (new layout). i've written the initial issues in 2003. in 2004 the task was distributed to the three hrds divisions so i only had to make them every three months. by 2005, other senior staff from my division were tasked to write the update so i've had to do it less often. i think my most recent update was in January 2005.

the layout has always been very simple -- a far cry from the one shown here. then, it was just a write-up of hrds' monthly acomplishments and activities in a long bond paper. i've tried spicing it up through changes in the titles, the borders and the "HRDS Update" logo, and making it a bit more readable by using two columns.

lately, submissions have been made way past the deadliest mark. (i think the november 2005 issue was submitted in february 2006!) now its march 2006 and i'm guilty of following the trend. my assignment is january 2006 and i'm just printing the final version. not totally my fault -- i've had to wring the neck of co-workers to give me the info i need.

but i've made changes... spicier changes... changes that more than made up for the late submission. (the bosses liked it and did not complain at all).

see for yourself. click the image to see the front page in full view.
click here to see the rest.



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credits for the HRDS Update January 2006 issue: write-up of "HRDS gains ground in 2005" courtesy of the HRDS CY 2005 report (executive summary) written by jet; forest fire training photo courtesy of alex; some titles edited with the help of danee; proofreading by ma'am fil and ate marie; and of course, my very special thanks to ate jean and her gang, the quick response team. (mwahahahahaaa!)

Mar 5, 2006

my online photo albums

ynseng @ Yahoo! Photos
http://photos.yahoo.com/ynseng
includes growing-up pics of maam & jaime, prenups & wedding photos (incomplete), weddings of friends and family, gimmicks & vacation photos. considering Yahoo! Photos' unlimited capacity, i've decided to upload here as many photos as i can.


click to open Yahoo! Photos


J&M Wedding @ Webshots.com
http://community.webshots.com/user/jaimemaamwedding
photo-documentation of our wedding. includes selected photos from on-the-day preparations to the reception, with captions/narration. photos by John Aguas.


click to open my Webshots gallery


J&M wedding @ Pbase.com
http://pbase.com/jms/jaimemaam
creative wedding pics (church & reception only) uploaded in the photographer's online album. photos by Jason Lunas

click to open my Pbase gallery


HRDS-TDD @ Yahoo! Photos
http://photos.yahoo.com/denr_hrds_tdd
not-so-official online album of training photos of TDD. also inlcudes jpeg versions of HRDS updates